i am currently pregnant in my 1st trimester.. so i feel easily tired for past month.. & i really dont have the energy to have sex with him most of the days.

i rejected him several times & he also said he understands my health & won't blame me.. Bullshit lor..

early today morning, i found out that he had been surfing porn websites before he went out for work (usually he wakes up lates & will be rushing out for work, where got time to surf net??!!) & i am not sure whether did he masturbate before he went out..

so i confronted him over the phone..
he denied at first but later he admitted that he surfed those porn sites (this is not the 1st time he's doing this, he had always wanted to lie to me.)
i asked him why he do that? i mean.. i am just sleeping beside you & if you are really horny, then should wake me up & do it.. why have to do such stupid thing? what will our baby think of you?
he said thousand times of sorry to me already.. but i am just so disappointed with him..
he's already a father-to-be, and still do such stupid thing & what's more, this is not the 1st time already... i've warned him several times & he stop doing this for a quite a while but now he's doing it again... my heart really breaks

i wanted to visit hospital this morning & get an abortion, leave him & start my life afresh.. but i cant bring myself to kill my baby... its unfair to the baby..
but i kept thinking.. what if he betray me later after i gave birth?
it may even be worse, i may jump off a building together with my baby... worse right?

what should i do? i am really at a total loss now..

How old are you?

You actually contemplated killing urself and the baby just because your husband watches porn???

It is just porn. Most men read and watch that. Seriously. Dont take it so seriously.

*pats

p/s: I am a girl

its not just about the porn websites...
what i cant forgive is that he still tried to lie to me even after i confronted him
then how many times had he actually lied to me before?

wathing porn is not a harm la.. since he know u tired and pregnant, should he always have sex with u ? u already said u cant make love with her everyday too what…

Originally posted by Pitot:

How old are you?

You actually contemplated killing urself and the baby just because your husband watches porn???

not just because he watches porn.. but if he betrays me one day.. i mean unfaithfulness.. betrayal.. sleeping with other women

if he's not interested in other women anymore, then why he still want to watch some other women in naked bodies??

well, u rejected ur HUSBAND s*x, and i believe it's glad that he only gone to prono website to relief himself, and not to geylang or some other gers.

btw, i believe gers on average lie more times than guys.
to guys, this is not lie. just paiseh to say out, or afraid that say out = ger angry.

Has he betrayed you? If not how can you judge based on him watching porn?

It is normal for men to masturbate as sexual urges are harder to control but easy to release. He may not admit to you because probably you make a fuss about it everytime he does, and men wants nothing but peace and quiet from their women.

I think what you are experiencing is depression - there is medication for this and please consult your doctor before you end up in a tragedy.

lai… guys own up.. how many of u watch porn and lie to your mum that u dun….

problematic wife.

He lies to you bcoz he knows tha you forbid him to do it, and he couldnt help it so he has to try to deny it 1st...It's juz...veri natural behaviour to be caught of doing something wrong. get him to apologise can already?

I dun understand y u making a big fuss over it....even the newspaper saying that surfing porns for guys sometimes is okie.

Besides, not as if he is going out to find another woman or wat...
you are a mother-to-be soon, be more matural and understanding?

We married for 19 yrs & he also watch porn *exchange CD with friends* & I don't even bother

Originally posted by iluvham:

its not just about the porn websites...
what i cant forgive is that he still tried to lie to me even after i confronted him
then how many times had he actually lied to me before?

im a male myself and i can tell u on confrontation, no man would admit that he surfed porn in front of women.

in my opinion, he did it in his own privacy and lied to u cux he din wan u to noe and worry abt having sex.
u gotta understand that every man has got his own sexual desires. ur pregnant now. of course he being understandable, resorts to surfing porn to satisfy his own desires.

try to control ur temper a bit. they say pregnant women got temper..i guess its true.
and dun ever think abt suiciding, its unfair to ur baby. fark..u actually think abt jumping down the building over this.

i suggest u go c a family counsellor with ur hubbie and have a gd talk.
fei yue family counselling services are gd. tv alwaes show them.

i recommend them.

He's trying to ease his needs so that he do not need to ask you to help him. He is concern for your health. See it from that view. If you are unhappy about the porn. Then manage the sexual r/s between the 2 of you so that he does not need to resort to porn. Won't that help you 2 become closer than to kick up a fuss? Anyways people watch porn sometimes to let off frustration and stream. Look at it from that point of view. As long as its not pervasive, perverted and addiction, it is ok.

If he ease his needs with a prostitude or another woman. Then it is fair for you to raise a big sh!t for him.

You think too much and thinking of drastic actions which is meaningless and harmful.

u said hte might not be a good father and he might interested in other woman

how bout u ?

can u really promise u can become a good mother just becuz u dun let ur husband watch porn ?

can u really be a good mother if u never even handle a kid by ur own ?

your husband only watch porn and u complaint bout it in here..

nex time your kid do something and u complain bout it here again is it ?

can u just grow up ? how u wan to become a good understanding wife and mother in future? ask urself la.. why ask ur husband ?

Originally posted by dumbdumb!:

problematic wife.

with natal blues

this is pre-natal depression.
suggest c doc..

rmb, ur hubbie loves u and baby so much that he cant bear to ask u for sex and can only turn to porn.

he loves u...

hey girl, I understand that being pregnant tough and its common for mothers to be to have pre natal depression, but please don't do anything silly.

firstly, men have urge. your hubby is sensitive to your discomfort and thats why he did not wake you up to do it. Be grateful u are having such a caring husband. Think about this, if he really did wake u up early in the morning for it, wont you be sad as well? blaming him for not caring enough, disturbing your sleep for his own urges?

then, him being reluctant to tell you the truth is probably because he knew u too well, that when u find out, he is going to have hell. So to avoid trouble, he wanted to hide it. Most guys, if they know that their partner tends to jump to conclusion or kick a fuss out of little things, will choose the easy way out.

Don't be silly and end a life just because of such little things. Why are u even having this baby in the 1st place if you love and faith for your husband can't withstand such a small ripple in life.

P.S. Men watching porn is like eating rice nowadays... yes even sec school boys watch it. your husband is a man. cut him some slack.

Also, if you keep your attitude, temper etc up, your husband may break down one day and may leave you for good even before you can jump off a building together with your baby. Please wake up. Being together takes patience, tolerace and forgiveness. You are living in a real world where people have their needs and life to live.

Originally posted by iluvham:

not just because he watches porn.. but if he betrays me one day.. i mean unfaithfulness.. betrayal.. sleeping with other women

if he's not interested in other women anymore, then why he still want to watch some other women in naked bodies??

i think the others explained already.

please don't do anything foolish over this....

like that also can.

loosen up la, he never f*ck around your back u can "tau chio" liao

because of this you want to abort the baby?
i'll give u the cruel b*stard reply "go ahead, you don't sound ready for it anyway"

NB this type of thing also need to complain

humans just like to give themselves problems

Originally posted by Jamie Zawinski:

with natal blues

she's so blue, she's turning purple from the lack of oxygen

maybe i didnt mentioned that this is going to be my 2nd marriage and my 1st marriage failed because my ex-husband committed adultery.

yes, i had serious depresssion after i found out my ex-husband slept with another woman... i commited suicides several times

so now i am just being extra cautious, i dont wish for history to repeat itself...
that is why i scream & shout at every of his intention for betrayal...

Hi iluvham,

Thought you might find this clip amusing: About men, women, sex, videos and porn.

Coupling - Inferno

that is why i scream & shout at every of his intention for betrayal...

good luck to ur husband in your second marriage if u think this is a betrayal and you having an overeaction like that.

Originally posted by iluvham:

maybe i didnt mentioned that this is going to be my 2nd marriage and my 1st marriage failed because my ex-husband committed adultery.

yes, i had serious depresssion after i found out my ex-husband slept with another woman... i commited suicides several times

so now i am just being extra cautious, i dont wish for history to repeat itself...
that is why i scream & shout at every of his intention for betrayal...

i think u meant attempted to commit suicide? if not it means u are dead a couple of times. touch wood.

Have you ever seek professional help regarding this issue? I think its high time u do so.