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my thumb is numb after i finished writing out one set of notes! what’s happening? ive written more than that before and it has never happened before. its the third day already. it doesnt hurt but theres this weird sensation. which kinda bothers me.

must be the pen that i was using. i was using those thin stabilo coloured pens. those with an orange base and the cap is the colour of the pen. and there are lines running along the pen. you know that kind??
i stubbed my toe so theres a blood blob on it. so i had to limp home.
my earphones spoiled!
so i had to
survive a day without music. on a happier note,i managed to get new
ones! lime green earphones! yay. the colour makes me happy.thats my whines for today
Edited by jaydunkfull 18 Jul `08, 3:51AM
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no leh. i remember there was once, one of my good looking guy friends was trying to do something, like poke me or something and my defence mechanisms just worked up, because i didnt want to be touched, not simply by any guy. and he was a cute guy. in my mind i didnt even think of trying to take the chance to stay in skin contact with him.
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whenever im out, i see a girl, and theres always a guy for her. a girl walks into the mrt, a guy follows behind, arms around her waist. a girl sits at a cafe, 10 minutes later, a guy joins her. any girl, of all shapes and sizes, of different race and appearances. they all have a partner. hot guy gets hot girl. lucky guy gets hot girl. not so lucky guy gets average looking girl. lucky girls get hot guys. whatever it is. they are happy together., to have that someone to confide in and to lean on. and i was strongly reminded of the song “Soulmate” by Natasha Bedingfield. the chorus goes
“Who doesn’t long for someone to hold. Who knows how to love you without being told Somebody tell me why I’m on my own.If there’s a soulmate for everyone”
If theres a soulmate for everyone. they say good things come to people who wait. why do the desperates never get it, but the ones who dont want it get it?
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when do you guys stop taking pocket money from your parents? when do your parents stop giving you pocket money?
im thinking next year, after jc? cos by then, if i enter u, school hours should be more flexible so i can afford to work and study, and earn my own keep
even now, i feel bad asking for more money from my parents because i come from a middle income family and i know they slog hard to put bread on the table.
anyway, 150 a month, is it a lot? is it too little? for an 18 year old. inclusive of food, notes and everything else. excluding transport
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im in the weirdest situation right now. its 4 am in the morning and im sitting outside my house, writing this post on my laptop. im locked out of my house and sitting at my doorstep, theres still connection from the modem in the house. the door is chained and bolted so even with the key i cant get in. my darn sister is a pig and cant hear her damn phone when she sleeps. i dont want to call home or ill wake everyone up. if i press the doorbell/ call home, my parents will know that i sneaked out of the house the entire night. i cant sit here till the next morning because i happen to be the one whos going to leave the house the earliest and ill be late if i wait for my parents to wake up.
i forgot my paranoid parents always chain and bolt the door! what am i going to do now??
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yes my heart skips a beat when i see him. i experienced that twice already. it was more of a jolt really. haha
and im shy…im dont wanna jeopardise our friendship by asking him if he likes me. i think i have a crush on him because all my life ive been hanging out with girls and this is one of the few times a guy initiates a conversation and talks to me so much online. perhaps its the novelty.
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signs and symptoms
1) the first thing i do when i get home is to log onto msn, just to see if hes online and wait and hope that he will talk to me
2) when i dont see him online, i dont feel like going online too
3) i doodle his name on tables
4) i catch myself looking for him in the crowd in school, in between classes, after assembly etc
5) i think about me and him together
6) i feel happy when i talk to him online
did i fall for him?
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