what age?
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hi all, i am jus curious.. at what age do u all think is the best for a lady to settle down?
is 21 too young?
or age has nothing gotta do with it? -
any age, as long as she (and him) is ready
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i always tot she was ready. and now.... i am left with nothing but debts and debts....Originally posted by FireIce:any age, as long as she (and him) is ready
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x2....Originally posted by FireIce:any age, as long as she (and him) is ready -
u "thought".....
is she really ready? -
yes. i thought she was ready. was valentine's day last year. i was totally in love wih her. i asked her to marry me. she said yes but i told her she need time to consider. so i said to her that she can tell me if she' willing to marry mewhen she's ready..
so 2 days later, we met and she very sweetly asked if imy words still stand, whether mny promise to her tat i'll marry her and take good care of her still stands... i said yes and she said yes to my proposal...
subsquently we went to discuss with our parents. and her father made arrangement for the location of the wedding dinner.
but on my birthday , she broke off with me.....
i guess she wasn't sure if she was ready....Originally posted by FireIce:u "thought".....
is she really ready? -
ppl change, ppl's perspective change.....
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she made me lose my confidence in marriage.Originally posted by FireIce:ppl change, ppl's perspective change.....
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Around mid-twenties better ? After finish studying and working a few years financially stable and thinking is more mature ?
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financially i was quite ready to take on the responsiblities.
perhaps she was still too young. she is still studying...Originally posted by paperchicken:Around mid-twenties better ? After finish studying and working a few years financially stable and thinking is more mature ? -
did u have a good talk with her to ask her wat is holding her back?
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Mid-twenty is good age to think of this. By this age, most gals are already left school and working adults liao. emotionally oso stable down.
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that day i went to place. and at first she try to avoid me, avoid my calls... my smses...
then i went to her place. i told her that i don't wanna discuss the issue at her place. so we went out the the void deck below her place to talk.
i guess i was so hurt that i can't say my words properly...
i asked why she came to that decision.
she jus replied that she was not ready for marriage.
den i told her that we can dun get married so soon but she said she was getting very tired of the relationship.
caused i used to work shifts and hardly any time to meet her except my off days..Originally posted by FireIce:did u have a good talk with her to ask her wat is holding her back? -
I believed that a true love relationship need tests, the harder the tests, the easier to determine whether one suits each other.. only time can tell whether you are ready to settle down and get married.
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she has given u the reasons....
and i bet there's nothing u can relli do (except to quit ur job) to rekindle the rship....
anyway, it seems her mind is set oredi
though i suspect there's more than to just "tired of the rship" crap......
it's better to end it now than when get married liao then she make a big fuss and end up in signing the papers at the lawyers later in life.....
move on......... -
i guess our relationship was not strong enough to withstand the test...
like many fellow forumites have said. maybe it's better that she leaves me now than for us to go into divorce later....
but i still loves her so much....Originally posted by OrneryBoy:I believed that a true love relationship need tests, the harder the tests, the easier to determine whether one suits each other.. only time can tell whether you are ready to settle down and get married. -
in fact i was really stupid then, i resigned from my previous job, which is shift work but pay's better, and ended up working elsewhere at a lower pay.
i guess u are right. her mind was set.
i tried not to think if her present bf was a factor back then.
even if so, there's still nothing i could do...Originally posted by FireIce:she has given u the reasons....
and i bet there's nothing u can relli do (except to quit ur job) to rekindle the rship....
anyway, it seems her mind is set oredi
though i suspect there's more than to just "tired of the rship" crap......
it's better to end it now than when get married liao then she make a big fuss and end up in signing the papers at the lawyers later in life.....
move on......... -
woah!
so fast got new bf??
ok, i think kinda understooded for this point............. -
we broke off a year plus one day ago.
den i onli recently , early this year, found out from her sister that she has a new BF.
so dunno if he happened to step in after we broke off, which i think so because i believe my ex is the faithful kind.Originally posted by FireIce:woah!
so fast got new bf??
ok, i think kinda understooded for this point............. -
yah man. not ready for marriage lah. not in stable relationship lah.
All bullshits. Fact is got new flame. -
i don't think so. because just a week before broke off we went to collect the wedding rings .and she looked very happy and blissful....Originally posted by ah_ken:yah man. not ready for marriage lah. not in stable relationship lah.
All bullshits. Fact is got new flame. -
encourage u to move on.. since she already gave up the r/s..Originally posted by hurt in love:i guess our relationship was not strong enough to withstand the test...
like many fellow forumites have said. maybe it's better that she leaves me now than for us to go into divorce later....
but i still loves her so much....
hope my words din pierce thru ur heart..
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see, she has moved on.....u shd too.....
now is not the time to fan jiu zhang, it's time to create a new life for urself.....
u've wasted a year.....u shd not waste more on something u can neber get back.....
wats urs will be urs......
there are other trees in the forest......
it might be difficult for u to pick up the pace again, but if u put in effort and be determined to put the past behind u, im sure ur ms right will appear soon.....jus let nature take its course.... -
hmmm generally
after college , get a career and then see how -
i believe ppl change perspective after coming out to work, they begin to see many things that they wouldnt even think about while schooling, when this happen, their needs change too. That is why i feel that Guys or gals should only settle down after they have started working a few years. Financially stable and probably wiser to their needs.