Obstacles to Love?
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Thats the beauty of life... It is full of surprises. You never know what your future will bring.Originally posted by Rhonda:Sometimes, when I feel down, I sing the song 'Yu Jian' by Stephanie Sun to myself. It's a form of catharsis! hehe.
The chorus is especially meaningful. Not sure if there's an online translation somewhere but I'm too lazy to go hunt for it so my loose translation of the chorus would be :
Whom shall I meet? What kind of conversations would we have?
How far away in the distant future would I finally meet the one I'm waiting for?
I hear the howl of the wind, coming from the underground and the ocean of people
I take my place in the queue for love, waiting with my ticket no. in hand...
Oh goodness gracious... it actually sounds pretty tacky! hahaha!!!
SO... Don't hurry love... stay still, and love will find its way to you
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i would want to believe that if you've meet the right person... everything is right. That's true love... making everything right.Originally posted by Rhonda:Come to think of it, we can be our own greatest obstacle to love in a way.
Ever heard of the concept of being 'The Right Person at the Wrong Time'? If there's something in you that's not ready to fall in love and be in a relationship, then even if you met the right person, nothing would happen, simply cause you're not ready for a relationship at this point in your life.
Once you're ready, and you meet someone else who's ready, even if he/she is not totally as compatible with you as others you've met before or who have yet to meet, you'd still have a relationship. Maybe that's when you have 'The Not-So-Right Person at the Right Time'.
Big headache... looks like if 'shi chen wei dao' (your time hasn't arrived yet), you can't do anything about it. -
na... i tot that's a pretty decent translation!Originally posted by Rhonda:Sometimes, when I feel down, I sing the song 'Yu Jian' by Stephanie Sun to myself. It's a form of catharsis! hehe.
The chorus is especially meaningful. Not sure if there's an online translation somewhere but I'm too lazy to go hunt for it so my loose translation of the chorus would be :
Whom shall I meet? What kind of conversations would we have?
How far away in the distant future would I finally meet the one I'm waiting for?
I hear the howl of the wind, coming from the underground and the ocean of people
I take my place in the queue for love, waiting with my ticket no. in hand...
Oh goodness gracious... it actually sounds pretty tacky! hahaha!!!
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yea... emotional baggage can be crippling... but looking at the other side of the coin, emotional baggage comes about from past experiences and what'd we be without that? Our trials and errors are excellent ways from which to learn more about ourselves, what we want, what we don't want, what should be done, what should be avoided etc. Without it, we'd be like pubescent teens, stumbling from one love disaster to another (not that with it we're that much better! if you know what i mean, hahahaaa...).Originally posted by the Bear:re-read this topic title again...
i would think one of the biggest obstacles would be... emotional baggage...
and the fear such baggage brings about paralysing people..
alas...
i guess what's important is to take these experiences in perspective and attempt to use it to our advantage, rather than convert it into damaging, excess baggage.
the biggest obstacle, in this sense, is yourself... -
looking at all ur posts..
i felt more relieved
cuz looks sure aint that impt anymore
for me
there used to exist a certain limit for certain physical chracteristics
thou now i`ve lifted all these parameters
still no luck ya?
anyway i`m not in a rush for these kinda things
haha
just a few words i need to say
thou looks aint everything
it does give the better looking ppl a better chance
i`ve seen many ppl who were nice looking but with rotten personality still bein rather popular.. juz becuz they are handsome/pretty ( esp gals )
while there are some who are not that physically blessed but haf a heart of gold.. or at least a nice character..
usually i`m w these ppl most of the time
haha..
that why they accept me into their groups wor
cuz i`m not gd looking either
keke -
Hmm... goodie, this thread seems alive again.
Yet another obstacle to love I suddenly thought of is... deception.
There are folks who say one thing, but mean another. The things they claim make you think that they are such and such a person and that might lead you in the wrong direction for a while but then you slowly come to realise that who they really are is different from what they claim themselves to be and it is the who they claim to be that you have actually fallen in love with.
Self-deception or a lack of real understanding of self, which misleads others. Kinda complicated, but one possible obstacle.
Falling in love with the persona... but not the person. Falling in love with the what-could-be's... but not the what-really-is. It happens. -
sometimes, it isn't deception that causes someone to fall for another...
it is probably an illusion... one thinks that the other is something he/she is not... and refuses to accept the truth, even when told over and again, until it is too late...
again, this is falling for what seems to be, but not what is... -
Faye and Neuros, you both said some really wise things. Always enjoy reading your posts.
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Isn't love supposed to be a simple thing?
Looking at this thread, you probably think love is such a complicated matter with more problems than goodness...
Let's go back to the basics again, if loving someone is so difficult, it's probably not true love. True love is between two persons, each showing the same committment towards the relationship.
If love comes, love comes. Simple as that.
If love goes, then let it go. Simple as that.
Life is too long to do nothing, yet too short to do everything. So please keep to just the happy things... -
*cough cough... Ahem...Originally posted by Rhonda:Faye and Neuros, you both said some really wise things. Always enjoy reading your posts. 
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Hmm... yet another obstacle could be taking things into your own hands and not letting go. Credit for this one goes to Eric and Neuros! I think we were talking about this a long while back.
If you love someone, let him / her go. If he / she loves you too, he / she will come flying back on their own free will.
If not, spear the bugger as it flies off and BBQ the bird for dinner! hahahahahaha!!!
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there will be no buggery involved here!!
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Yup, yup! Eric, you're wise too. No need to ahem so much! hahaha!Originally posted by EricDraven:Isn't love supposed to be a simple thing?
Looking at this thread, you probably think love is such a complicated matter with more problems than goodness...
Let's go back to the basics again, if loving someone is so difficult, it's probably not true love. True love is between two persons, each showing the same committment towards the relationship.
If love comes, love comes. Simple as that.
If love goes, then let it go. Simple as that.
Life is too long to do nothing, yet too short to do everything. So please keep to just the happy things...
Yeah, we did say in the beginning that if it takes too much effort to move the wheels, it probably ain't real love.
I just love to discuss things, trivial or otherwise. And it's always nice to hear the opinions of others in here. -
Sometimes its.. Timing too.
Meet the right person at wrong time
you will find you dont know how to love the right person in the right way
and can lose him/her
so sometimes
heartbreaks are educational and
waiting is necessary -
I think all said, you can't find love... love has to find you.
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i disagree.. no point sitting around waiting to be found...
earn the right to love.. go find your other half! -
Originally posted by the Bear:i disagree.. no point sitting around waiting to be found...
earn the right to love.. go find your other half!
Nah... with my rotten luck, I always end up looking for love in all the wrong places. Or in this case, wrong people! hehe! I guess it doesn't help that I'm myopic!
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hee...
Actually i think if you try too hard to find love
then very often, you will mistake what is NOT love for love
simply cos you want so badly to believe you have found it
There are many types of love... not just BGR
I am sure some people love pets, love nature, love sports
pursue WHAT you love, and eventually you will find WHO you love
Love Life! and i think life works a lot better for you when you love it enough! -
Originally posted by ShrodingersCat:hee...
Actually i think if you try too hard to find love
then very often, you will mistake what is NOT love for love
simply cos you want so badly to believe you have found it
There are many types of love... not just BGR
I am sure some people love pets, love nature, love sports
pursue WHAT you love, and eventually you will find WHO you love
Love Life! and i think life works a lot better for you when you love it enough! I concur! -
Yeah, don't go looking for love so hard just for the sake of looking for love...Originally posted by ShrodingersCat:hee...
Actually i think if you try too hard to find love
then very often, you will mistake what is NOT love for love
simply cos you want so badly to believe you have found it
There are many types of love... not just BGR
I am sure some people love pets, love nature, love sports
pursue WHAT you love, and eventually you will find WHO you love
Love Life! and i think life works a lot better for you when you love it enough!
When love comes, it's natural and you will know you found it.
Then again, you can't hide yourself up the whole day and expect love to find you... unless it's truly a miracle. Go out there and pursue your interests, know more people and maybe, just maybe, love is around the corner! -
you have a problem?Originally posted by EricDraven:*cough cough... Ahem... -
tat's in an ideal world...Originally posted by EricDraven:Isn't love supposed to be a simple thing?
Looking at this thread, you probably think love is such a complicated matter with more problems than goodness...
Let's go back to the basics again, if loving someone is so difficult, it's probably not true love. True love is between two persons, each showing the same committment towards the relationship.
If love comes, love comes. Simple as that.
If love goes, then let it go. Simple as that.
Life is too long to do nothing, yet too short to do everything. So please keep to just the happy things...
life though, is rarely so simple...
if only...
sigh... -
Yeah... Eric, when you're thrown right into the hurricane, it's not that easy to get to the vortex to claim your little oasis of peace and calm amidst the turmoil and turbulence.Originally posted by neuros:tat's in an ideal world...
life though, is rarely so simple...
if only...
sigh... -
Life and love is really that simple, if you want it to be...Originally posted by neuros:tat's in an ideal world...
life though, is rarely so simple...
if only...
sigh...
I hate complications and I will let it go if need be...
Why make life hard for yourself? -
Eric, matters of the heart are not always that easy to deal with. You can be optimistic but you also have to be realistic. Knots in the heart not easy to undo. It does take time sometimes... ultimately, time heals all wounds.Originally posted by EricDraven:Life and love is really that simple, if you want it to be...
I hate complications and I will let it go if need be...
Why make life hard for yourself? Such things cannot be trivialised one.