Guys, if you loved a lady...

• Rhonda

  9 Mar 05, 01:27

  ... would the fact that she might not be able to bear you children put you off marrying her?
  
  If you're a lady, share your views on adoption here!
• skeujin

  9 Mar 05, 01:30

  i marry her because i love her whatever she is physically or mentally.
  
  havg kids is a bonus or a pain to some...
  
  n in-laws r thorns tt comes with the rose....
• Rhonda

  9 Mar 05, 01:39

  Yo, skeujin! Long time no see!
  
  So, I guess it wouldn't matter at all to you. I'm just wondering cause in the West, they're more open-minded about adoption compared to over here.
  
  In fact, I know of a few American couples who adopted baby girls from China and they're big-hearted enough to overlook the race issue.
• skeujin

  9 Mar 05, 01:50

  Originally posted by Rhonda:

  Yo, skeujin! Long time no see!
  
  So, I guess it wouldn't matter at all to you. I'm just wondering cause in the West, they're more open-minded about adoption compared to over here.
  
  In fact, I know of a few American couples who adopted baby girls from China and they're big-hearted enough to overlook the race issue.

  heyo ron! been bz w wrk. hardly log on anymore. oni here to chk my fan mail. hahaha....
  
  well adoption may not be common plc here in sg bt it still happens. jus tt not many people are willing to share their personal lives to frens.
  
  race wise i dnt think will ever b a big issue, here or anywhr. its more like wen u see the kid n immediatly having a bond with the child... jus take angelina jolie. she adopteda cambodian kid...
• Kuali Baba

  9 Mar 05, 01:52

  I don't know. I wouldn't mind adoption though.
• fennymouse

  9 Mar 05, 02:08

  if the guy really loves her, i think he wouldn't mind...
• jOhO

  9 Mar 05, 02:11

  yeah no problem at all.
  
  this coming from me who WANTS kids... but u know... love has gotta come first priority.
• BrUtUs

  9 Mar 05, 04:35

  Originally posted by Rhonda:

  ... would the fact that she might not be able to bear you children put you off marrying her?
  
  If you're a lady, share your views on adoption here!

  i dont mind.... dont care abt children...
• SydneyLibrarian

  9 Mar 05, 06:56

  Originally posted by Rhonda:

  Yo, skeujin! Long time no see!
  
  So, I guess it wouldn't matter at all to you. I'm just wondering cause in the West, they're more open-minded about adoption compared to over here.
  
  In fact, I know of a few American couples who adopted baby girls from China and they're big-hearted enough to overlook the race issue.

  Yea... like this singer Steven Curtis Chapman... he adopted 3 Chinese girls & has kids of his own, too! What a big heart the guy has
  
  Hmm.. haven't thought of this issue of adoption for myself, though...
• Kenashi

  9 Mar 05, 08:29

  Love overcome all!!!
  I got 2 aunties who have adopted kids.
  I don't mind adoption, all that matter is love btw couple.
• CryoLind

  9 Mar 05, 09:24

  I won mind adopting kids too.....
  
  Even when i have kids of my own and financially we are able to have more, yet i hv stop my factory operations, i won mind adopting somemore. It feels good to give the unfortunates a chance to hv a happy family. And to love n treat them as your own....
• elindra

  9 Mar 05, 09:27

  Originally posted by Rhonda:

  ... would the fact that she might not be able to bear you children put you off marrying her?
  
  If you're a lady, share your views on adoption here!

  Actually I don't mind adopting kids. Have my own and adopt as well would be nice. I mean there are so many underprivilaged children out there and it would be nice to give them a fair chance in life too.
  
• CryoLind

  9 Mar 05, 09:30

  Originally posted by elindra:

  Actually I don't mind adopting kids. Have my own and adopt as well would be nice. I mean there are so many underprivilaged children out there and it would be nice to give them a fair chance in life too.
  

  Huh? same feelings yah?
• neuros

  9 Mar 05, 09:33

  my cousin just adopted a baby boy from indonesia some time late last year. they had problems conceiving. previously the wife had a few miscarriages and they tried ivf but didn't work, so they decided to adopt.
  
  miraculously, shortly after that, the wife got pregnant. she's still pregnant.
  
  i can't help thinking tho, will there be any favoritism after the baby's born?
  even if they do not practice any favoritism, there might still be emotional barriers to overcome? especially since the adopted child is obviously non-chinese. as time goes by it'd definitely be apparent to him (and others around him) that he looks different from his parents and sibling.
  
  i'm not against adoption. quite on the contrary, in fact. it's just that i think human nature, esp with the asian/chinese culture, there'd be a wide range of difficulties to surmount in such circumstances.
  
  i dunno whether i'm being overly-cynical or paranoid.
  
  i just wish them all the best, esp the little boy...
  
  but when all's said and done, i guess the little boy is lucky in a sense - at least he'd have a decent education and more comfortable life than if he'd not been adopted? but again, one never know, do we?
• Ecxentrique

  9 Mar 05, 09:46

  What if the wife can give birth but doesn't want to? Will that be a problem?
• InnoHippo

  9 Mar 05, 10:59

  Originally posted by Rhonda:

  ... would the fact that she might not be able to bear you children put you off marrying her?
  
  If you're a lady, share your views on adoption here!

  It would be a pity not to be able to have children of my own creation .....
  
  but some things are just beyond our control at times .....
• shinta

  9 Mar 05, 11:25

  if i'm above 29, i would go for adoption, IF i wan a kid...
• RaTtY81

  9 Mar 05, 11:30

  i dun mind if she cant bear me child cos i truely love her. adoption is the key...
• UandMe

  9 Mar 05, 11:38

  kids are little devils...
• the Bear

  9 Mar 05, 20:28

  i would love her.. and all that she is..
  
  simple as that
  
  
• browniebaobao

  9 Mar 05, 20:36

  I would be sad if i can't have my own children.. Adoption is not so bad wor..my niece is adopted by my uncle..but she is so loveable! Going to be 4 years old liao..first 3 years stayed with her bio parents in china..then came to sg..if u like children and cannot have children..i dun think there's any problem with showing love for a child who is not related to u by blood ba.
• browniebaobao

  9 Mar 05, 20:39

  Originally posted by shinta:

  if i'm above 29, i would go for adoption, IF i wan a kid...

  29 not v old wor...wei shen me bu yao zi ji sheng?
• Simple_Bear

  9 Mar 05, 20:40

  Yoz...
  
  If U 2 truly love one another n U know tt Ur wife cant bear children...then adopt lohz...I agree with the rest...love is the most impt tin...the adopted child will be better off in a family with loving parents...
  
  Cheers...
  
  
• Nelstar

  9 Mar 05, 20:42

  Originally posted by Rhonda:

  ... would the fact that she might not be able to bear you children put you off marrying her?
  

  If u love a woman, u dont see her as a baby making machine...
  
  
• the Bear

  9 Mar 05, 20:43

  yah... ladies still have healthy children at 40
  
  but adoption is good if biologically unable to have children... love can be lavished on a child who might not have the chance to be all he/she can be if somewhere else...
  
  that being said, the assistant of the chiropractor i go to, said that after an accident, she was told she could not have children... but after being treated by her employer, she's going to have a child soon
  
  

  Originally posted by browniebaobao:

  29 not v old wor...wei shen me bu yao zi ji sheng?