To love ... is to obey
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It's just like someone put 40k to your shared account and become part of your money.Originally posted by tare:i wouldn't say we can rip the govt of $$....
but someone said of this, "subsidised hdb flat is our only birthright as a s'porean. if we don't take we are simply giving up it with no cost to the country..."
*disclaimer: not i say one!
Not like you have to return 40k back to them anytime.
It helps poor people like to me to start early. -
you can go thru marriage rituals, just that it's not recognised i think..Originally posted by Nelstar:Cohabitation is by choice. Marriage is also by choice.
Some people treat marriage like another contract paper, sign and break contract. It differs from case to case.
However, you're not supposed to go through marriage rituals without ROM. (I heard that was a change in this ruling but donno when they changed.)
Marriage is a spiritual comfort to your partner that he/she will be protected if he/she suffers a permanent damage. It is also a reminder that they are responsible for each other when they decide to separate.
You might highlight the same with cohabitation but it is naturally harder to mentally accept the other as compared to marriage. Generally speaking, many surveys had shown that married couples have more responsibility towards their other half. However, that number is gradually declining.
I don't know about you, most people are irresponsible by nature, and unless required, they will not shoulder responsibility. This is especially so in hardships. They tend to take the easier way out. When that easy way out becomes a difficult route, they will then be more considerate.
Anyway, most of the time it depends on the different individuals to live their lives to the fullest.
Given an opportunity to easily rip the Government of money to get my shelters... I'll say why not?
my memory's gettin from bad to worse
ya hor... 30 - 40k -
Most hotels do not allow non-married couples to hold wedding dinner.Originally posted by shinta:you can go thru marriage rituals, just that it's not recognised i think..
my memory's gettin from bad to worse
ya hor... 30 - 40k
Hmmm interesting note.
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oh..Originally posted by Nelstar:Most hotels do not allow non-married couples to hold wedding dinner.
Hmmm interesting note. -
how come u're still @ home?
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Today 12 then work + i eat outside, i only need to reach at 1Originally posted by shinta:how come u're still @ home?
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wah.. lunch together den?Originally posted by Nelstar:Today 12 then work + i eat outside, i only need to reach at 1 
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I dun even think a woman should be submissive to her man....
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ok. lunch then go.Originally posted by shinta:wah.. lunch together den? -
gimme a call when u reachOriginally posted by Nelstar:ok. lunch then go. -
Certain matters, at certain timeOriginally posted by sbst275:I dun even think a woman should be submissive to her man....
Submissive wouldn solve anything. the best way is to compromise
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But powerful woman rather be submissive at home... Anyone know why?Originally posted by shinta:Certain matters, at certain time
Submissive wouldn solve anything. the best way is to compromise -
have enuff of power struggle at work liao..Originally posted by sbst275:But powerful woman rather be submissive at home... Anyone know why?
go home n be submissive
it's tiring u noe to be the one in power at work n at home. -
Dear Rhonda....Originally posted by Rhonda:OK, back to the topic!
We don't make good decisions all the time. When I get married and I realise that my husband is going to make a dodgy decision that might have bad consequences, I will gently step in to point out the dangers to him and discuss alternative solutions. I sure hope that he won't be so 'ba dao' / dictatorial that he will not listen and expect me to blindly obey, because I cannot and I won't go against logic and I cannot just stand by and watch our ship sink.
To love is to 'obey', as in, to 'accept, accord, acquiesce, agree, assent, concur, and embrace' my spouse's decisions. I will accord him the respect by not belittling him and shattering his fragile ego whilst we're discussing about things. Because I love him, I will tread carefully when I have to tap him on the shoulder, and point out the possible dangers ahead. But sorry, to blindly obey, especially when you see that he's steering the ship towards a huge iceberg, just does not cut it for me! I would probably love him too much to see him walk into a ravine and will definitely 'disobey' by gently but firmly grabbing hold of his hand and together, walk around the ravine, and not into it together. 
very well said....ever consider posting ur writeup in Today??
Just to share with the others.... -
Noticed such woman very kuai to their husband one...Originally posted by shinta:have enuff of power struggle at work liao..
go home n be submissive
it's tiring u noe to be the one in power at work n at home. -
depends osoOriginally posted by sbst275:Noticed such woman very kuai to their husband one... -
Because of one word ... ... ... ... ... L-O-V-E!Originally posted by sbst275:But powerful woman rather be submissive at home... Anyone know why?
Being powerful and assertive at work is one thing, but the home is not a corporate battlefield. Rather, it's a place lovingly built by a couple and where both should trust and love each other enough to do things for each other in love. Love makes us choose to do things willingly for our special ones.
That's why I take such a stand against the word obey. If I know that my husband loves eating his prawns peeled, I will gladly do so out of love, and he wouldn't even need to ask, and NOT out of obedience because he ordered me, 'Hey, peel my prawns for me, will ya?'. Things like that should be done with quiet love, not quiet obedience.
To obey means that there has to be a 'command', an 'instruction' given which you have to follow and 'obey'. I'd rather things at home be done because you love him, because he loves you, no powerplay, no boardroom-like battles, no scheming and strategising or megalomaniac ego at work! -
Originally posted by cindtan29:Dear Rhonda....
very well said....ever consider posting ur writeup in Today??
Just to share with the others.... Thanks! What a compliment! hehe! Today, I know when I report for work, I'll be called into the Empress Dowager's office for a huge scolding but, I shall think of your compliment and 'faze out' her harsh words. -
Poor thingOriginally posted by Rhonda: Thanks! What a compliment! hehe! Today, I know when I report for work, I'll be called into the Empress Dowager's office for a huge scolding but, I shall think of your compliment and 'faze out' her harsh words. -
Yeah, quite a large number of my colleagues kena the firing squad yesterday and I was forewarned. Apparently, a few ended up crying.Originally posted by sbst275:Poor thing Today's my turn and when she starts, I'll quickly turn up the songs running in my head and make them go in repetitive loops.
Sigh... it's just work but they make such personal attacks on us.
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maybe you're right..Originally posted by shinta:have enuff of power struggle at work liao..
go home n be submissive
it's tiring u noe to be the one in power at work n at home.
have a friend who just ROMed.. the bride is a powerhouse woman at work, earning much more than him, but of course he isn't faring too bad himself.
when my fren told me that she's a very very tough and agressive boss (he used to work under her, not anymore tho) but at home, she's sweet and let's my fren take over in "heading" the family. (please take that statement with a pinch of salt, i'm sure they do discuss impt matters before coming to any decisions etc etc) mind u my fren is no weakling, nor is he a "wife basher". i was pretty shocked that he described her as such a boss when i do not see such traits in her AT ALL. i know them both pretty well, and will be photographing their wedding in dec.
boggles the mind. he INSISTS she's a real bitch at work! -
She emotion not OK si boh?Originally posted by Rhonda:Yeah, quite a large number of my colleagues kena the firing squad yesterday and I was forewarned. Apparently, a few ended up crying. Today's my turn and when she starts, I'll quickly turn up the songs running in my head and make them go in repetitive loops.
Sigh... it's just work but they make such personal attacks on us. -
They can be classified as a bitch at work... Not to the husbandOriginally posted by jOhO:maybe you're right..
have a friend who just ROMed.. the bride is a powerhouse woman at work, earning much more than him, but of course he isn't faring too bad himself.
when my fren told me that she's a very very tough and agressive boss (he used to work under her, not anymore tho) but at home, she's sweet and let's my fren take over in "heading" the family. (please take that statement with a pinch of salt, i'm sure they do discuss impt matters before coming to any decisions etc etc) mind u my fren is no weakling, nor is he a "wife basher". i was pretty shocked that he described her as such a boss when i do not see such traits in her AT ALL. i know them both pretty well, and will be photographing their wedding in dec.
boggles the mind. he INSISTS she's a real bitch at work! -
well she was a bitch to him when he was her staff! ahah.. he used to hate her.. can u believe that?Originally posted by sbst275:They can be classified as a bitch at work... Not to the husband
but at home and play (which is when i see them) she's NO WHERE near that. at first i debelieved him, then one nite when i was on msn with her, she confirm that wat he said is true. mauahaha
of course she didn't say she was a bitch, but she is very tough on her staff and actually she's trying not to be so aggressive at work becos it's very stressful and now that she's married, wanna have kids next time etc etc better tone down.. ahahha
she's a good girl. -
man i can't stand such pple.Originally posted by Rhonda:Yeah, quite a large number of my colleagues kena the firing squad yesterday and I was forewarned. Apparently, a few ended up crying. Today's my turn and when she starts, I'll quickly turn up the songs running in my head and make them go in repetitive loops.
Sigh... it's just work but they make such personal attacks on us.
that statement itself is enuff for me to urge u to try get another job. i guess if it doesn't happen often then ok, but if it's like weekly or fortnightly, i think it's too much.