Abortion After Effect
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I regretted doing it, even until today. It was 3 yrs ago...
But every now n then, I can still feel tat s/he is ard me. S/he got no where 2 go. Jus follow me wherever I go. Some nites, I can feel tat s/he is standing by my bedside, looking @ me n ask, "mami, y u dun wan me?" I can't sleep then.
Whenever I saw toddler ard 3yrs old, I felt more gulity. If I hadn't do it, my bb will b tis big!
I know I hv 2 let it go, but very tough...
So please gals out there, please DUN DO IT!!!!!!!! u will regret it. Never go 4 abortion! -
there there.. what is done is past and you can't change it...
just try to learn and grow from the painful lessons learnt, and hope and pray that you can somehow forgive yourself..
i'll never know what you have gone through but i do hope you will be well and if in the future, you do have children again, love and treasure them for the blessings they are.. -
Sorry to hear about your plight..
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Did you read abt the thread where the guy looking for the cheapest way to abort his unwanted child?
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well .. wat passed is passed .. regret also can't changed the past ..
leave the past behind n move on -
Thks 4 all ur replies.
It is not easy 2 4get. It is a torment... n I felt like a murderer. -
it's probably something you'll never forget...
just have to learn to forgive yourself, make peace with yourself..
and if you can, help others going through the same thing... with thoughts of doing the same thing.. maybe, with your first hand experience, you can help them through..
some good may come out of the whole thing...
again, i hope you will be well..Originally posted by flyme2moon:Thks 4 all ur replies.
It is not easy 2 4get. It is a torment... n I felt like a murderer. -
I am sure you have your reasons for doing it at that time. Don't blame yourself too much, it is over and life goes on...
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Hi Bear, thks. I m well. Jus tat every now n then I'll think abt it n it is torturing. n yesterday after reading the story "Dedicated to all the unborn children ..."Originally posted by the Bear:it's probably something you'll never forget...
just have to learn to forgive yourself, make peace with yourself..
and if you can, help others going through the same thing... with thoughts of doing the same thing.. maybe, with your first hand experience, you can help them through..
some good may come out of the whole thing...
again, i hope you will be well..
I felt more upset... -
it happens.. someone wrote "regret reminds us that we're alive"
which refers to our humanity.. we aren't perfect.. which means we make mistakes... and along with mistakes come the responsibilities to shoulder them.. we all make mistakes...
what would be terrible is if we do not learn and grow, and become better people from these lessons... some at a cost which is very very heartbreaking...
gather strength from your sorrow.. and make it a point to help when you can, and hopefully, if you do have a chance again, to be able to love with everything you've got, when you can...
because you've been to the other side...Originally posted by flyme2moon:Hi Bear, thks. I m well. Jus tat every now n then I'll think abt it n it is torturing. n yesterday after reading the thread "Dedicated to all the unborn children ..."
I felt more upset... -
hi flyme2moon,
don't think about it anymore lah.....like i said earlier (below) its not a baby yet....
u feel it around u cos its yr mental guilt haunting u....so u think its around u....
i am telling u it might not even exist yet (in terms of spirit -if there is in this world) so?? the one that is supposed to be for your baby might have already happily recarnated liao
( i mean u hv to think of all the positive stuff, the things u believe in, to get on with life)
don't think about it anymore ok....
r u going to plan for another child?? well if you don't hv any children yet, it will be good to try to hv one....u can give him/her all your love...and the child will help u heal all your sorrow and pain...
take care!
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Originally posted by a_splash:
indeed not the rite place to tok further on such a topic
but flyme2moon....u were only 7 weeks only, its not a baby yet rite? so please don't be so sad...by the way do u have children now?? or trying for one now??
sharing this with u, i lost one before....tried like mad for a third after being convinced by hubby to hv one more(my first two were easy peasy), and finally conceived, jumped for joy....i can't rem how many weeks later....on one visit to gynae,....doc announced baby's heart beat no more...had stopped growing....oh boy....i was so damn sad....couldn't believe it at all.....
seriously....u won't even know what would hv happened even if u had let it continue....so do get over it.......cos its over its over......
do not think yourself as a murderer please..... -
[quote]Originally posted by a_splash:
[b]hi flyme2moon,
don't think about it anymore lah.....like i said earlier (below) its not a baby yet....
u feel it around u cos its yr mental guilt haunting u....so u think its around u....
i am telling u it might not even exist yet (in terms of spirit -if there is in this world) so?? the one that is supposed to be for your baby might have already happily recarnated liao ( i mean u hv to think of all the positive stuff, the things u believe in, to get on with life)
don't think about it anymore ok....
take care!
Ya, I pray tat s/he b reincarnate... u know I dun loose it easily. S/he actually tortured me b4 leaving.
Yes, 7 weeks is too small. So my gynea can't see bb frm normal ultrasound, hv 2 insert the ultrasound tube inside 2 see. Then it triggered a miscarriage. I suffered nearly a week of non-stop bleeding... the pain was unbearable. worst then child birth! -
well you have already done it.and by coming here to warn other females to think twice before acting,you have done the right thing and there's nothing more you can do,so just get along with your life.
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Just try to get over it like most say, its hard but try. No point crying over spilt milk.
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Originally posted by flyme2moon:
that's call abortion??
Ya, I pray tat s/he b reincarnate... u know I dun loose it easily. S/he actually tortured me b4 leaving.
Yes, 7 weeks is too small. So my gynea can't see bb frm normal ultrasound, hv 2 insert the ultrasound tube inside 2 see. Then it triggered a miscarriage. I suffered nearly a week of non-stop bleeding... the pain was unbearable. worst then child birth![/b]
no go in, put to sleep, wake up then go home meh??? its really like nothing happend one le..... -
May the holy spirit touch you & bless you with inner peace ! *Amen*
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dats not abortion leh...dats miscarriage...you didn't tell your doctor you want to abort it right? He/She inserted the tube and triggered the miscarriage by mistake?Originally posted by flyme2moon:[quote]
Ya, I pray tat s/he b reincarnate... u know I dun loose it easily. S/he actually tortured me b4 leaving.
Yes, 7 weeks is too small. So my gynea can't see bb frm normal ultrasound, hv 2 insert the ultrasound tube inside 2 see. Then it triggered a miscarriage. I suffered nearly a week of non-stop bleeding... the pain was unbearable. worst then child birth! -
Tat's 4 normal procedure.Originally posted by a_splash:that's call abortion??
no go in, put to sleep, wake up then go home meh??? its really like nothing happend one le.....
U know, on my 1st appt wif KK to terminate my preggy, they sent me 4 ultrasound 2 check how big the bb was. but the normal ultrasound couldn't c my bb, too small. So the Ultrasound technician hv 2 insert a tube-like ultrasound device into my private part. Tis way, my bb could be seen. Then the gynea said too small 4 abortion, they could not do it. Give me appt 2 go back a week later.
But the next mornin, I got brown discharge. So I went 2 KK A&E, hoping they jus get rid of it. Then the A&E MO did the tube-scanning again! He said if I dun wan the bb, no pt let me stay hospital. Asked me 2 go hm, if bleed than go back.
The next day, I bleed like menstruation. So I went back 2 KK. The MO did the tube-scanning AGAIN!!! He said ok, can do it liao. But I also need ligation at the same time. The MO said he's not specialist, can't do both. Made an appt n asked me 2 go see specialist 2 days later! So I go back n bleed 4 another 2 days. I lied in bed most of time, so painful n no strength...
It was a Wed appt, before seeing the specialist, I had 2 do the tube-scanning AGAIN!!! The specialist then informed me tat my bb got no heart beat liao. n he assured me he will do the abortion n ligation 2gether safely. He tried 2 book the operation theatre on Thu. But FULL liao! So he had 2 book on Fri!!! Meaning bleeding another day lor!
I tell u lor, it was all torturing! It was very painful!
Fortunately on Fri, everything went on smoothly. Put 2 sleep, did it n gone liao... -
Hi..was reading this page...using my bf's account now. Might as well share mine with you. I was almost 6 months pregnant before I got the abortion done. I had a twin boys. Was studying in Melbourne, and mum didn't know. I lost my father 3 years ago. So I had to toggle with school, and pre-natal care and endless most expensive visits to the doctor which I had to starve myself to pay up for. I rang mum to send me extra cash, not like she didn't have, but she just kpkb. In the end said no, but told me if i needed help I could go to her. When I did, she turned away...even moral support was denied.
In the end, I sold everything I had, my i-pod, my electronic keyboard, some electronic things like an mp3 player, and with the help of my friends, we managed to raise enough money for me to buy a ticket home from Melbourne. Austrian Air, already around 600+ and I only get 785 a month, sometimes less.
In the end, to cut a super long story short, I went for the abortion, whcich cost me not only 4k(that one doesn't bother me as much as what it did to me), but a very scarred person. My mother heck care, threw me out of the house.
What I mean to say is, that although yes, the nightmares and the guilt and feelings of being a murderer are more than strong in ladies who have gone through abortions, sadly, life must go on. The doctor told me one of my boys had an abnormal head, a kind of birth defect, so i might not survive if I gave birth, let alone the two boys. I turned out fine, but my boys are dead. Maybe its kind of unfair, but at the moment just try to lift yourself up and carry on. It hurts like hell, but it truly isn't the end of the world.
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Urs so big liao! Meaning u hv 2 induce labour lor! sigh... anw ur bb not healthy, it is still ok.
U know I was preg wen I was 15yrs old, 5 mths preg. went 2 Mt E n thought of abortion. But the ultrasound showed twin gals. The gynea told me tat if I wanna do it, will cost $2k 2 induce labour, n maybe also cost my life. So my then bf decided 2 get marry, rather then abortion. So I was married like tat.
Now my gals r 15yrs old.
I went through lots of shit raising the twins. So I hv phobia. Both my hubby n I decided not 2 hv any more bb. So the 3rd was not saved. S/he has 2 go... -
flyme2moon, I'm so sorry that you had to go through all that. It didn't sound like Standard Operating Procedures and what you had to endure certainly seemed to make everything worse. I guess sometimes, we make mistakes that fill us with regret for a long, long time but we do have to learn to make peace with our mistakes, pray for forgiveness, and then move on. By sharing your experience, I'm sure you'll help a few other ladies who are in the same dilemma of deciding to abort or not, make a more informed decision. It's time to let go and forgive yourself.
GwenSilv, you sound like a very strong person. It's not easy to do what you had to do but you seem to have learnt from your experience, and moved on with a positive attitude. You made the best of a bad situation and whilst it was very tough having to sell everything you've got to get things done, I'm just relieved that you managed to pick up the pieces.
I guess if I ever found myself to be pregnant outside marriage, I'll probably keep the baby no matter what. I believe in the sanctity of life and even if I was abandoned and have to become a single mom, I guess I'll just hope that my friends and family will provide a support network as I go through the process of pregnancy and single motherhood.
I've seen abortions happening in the Operating Theatres and the minute they turned on the suction, I started to squirm and wince and it was tough to tell myself, 'Be professional!' and continue standing there to assist. Deep inside me, I just wished the girls would say, 'I don't want to proceed with this abortion now - I want to think about it some more' after the doctor and/or nurses give them a last discussion to ascertain that they really want to go ahead with the procedure. Sadly, during my stint there, I realised that there are still a minority out there, who persist in using abortions as a form of contraception!
Hopefully, your experiences would help others who are in similar circumstances right now, make a better decision. -
Sorry, duplicate post!
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I think, talk it out... To your husband or who you feel comfy with...
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We make decision which may "look" right in the past that sound ridiculous stupid now. Apart from learning the past mistake and do good in the future, what else can we do? Lament of the past will not bring back the time, life still goes on.
All of sad cases happen everyday and everywhere. Look into the future and move on with life. -
Wooo.....Mind your languageOriginally posted by rainee:Did you read abt the thread where the guy looking for the cheapest way to abort his unwanted child?
Farking cb u, you think this is a laughing matter?!! You are so darn evil!