Traditional Chinese Wedding Dinner Horrors!!
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we're talkin about if WE are the ones holding the dinner aka the couple gettin married.Originally posted by edLow:if tat the case.. give within the dinner rate and ur own limit.. if u noe u be attending a dinner. the card are usually given out as early as a month before.. so start to save if require lor... u hav a nice dinner celebrating ur frd's wed and at the same time u dont make ur frd suffer frm loses wat. -
not every frds or ours are holding their dinner in some expensive hotel ballroom... where each table cost a min of 888.Originally posted by Rhonda:See, the thing is, you WANT to celebrate your friend's wedding, but you can't because of your tight budget.
It would hurt me to know that my friends won't be attending my wedding because they cannot afford the money.
Now, why not hold an event where everyone can attend, and money's not a huge huge barrier to any party?
That would make it a true celebration in all sense of the word, wouldn't it?
majority are still holding their dinner at chinese resturant (within my circle of frds) which might cost ard 600 to 800 per table. -
Yeah, shinta!Originally posted by shinta:He's not gettin it, dun think he'd ever will.
I give up! Surrender!! -
i haben..Originally posted by Deportivo:Married
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Deportivo
Shinta
Single
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Rhonda
who else?
ask nellie.....
when are u gg to marry shinta? -
What is the point of having a wedding dinner at a 5-star hotel because you expected ang-paos that can defray the cost?Originally posted by edLow:it's a fact wat.. so lets say are u willing to give a 100 bucks ang pow to ur malay frd's dinner? no link rite...
and when u decided to help ur frd by giving a bigger ang pow (200 bucks) for a chinese dinner. u end up cursing n swear like others bout being ex$, no money n etc.. isnt it the same.. so why dont we just give an ang pow tat is within our limit and doesnt make ur frd suffer a huge lose for the dinner.
ex: if u noe it cost bout 800 per table.. each table can seat 10 ppls. divide down. is bout $80 per person..
- if u are extremely tight with ur wallet.. maybe u just tell ur frd early tat u cant attend becos of work commitment and maybe visit them on another day with some small gifts.
- if u are doing fine n abit tight with ur wallet.. maybe u just give a 80 or 88 angpow?
- if u are doing fine and extremely generous with ur wallet. u can give how much u wan.
What is the point of having guests when those who can pay turn up and half of those good friends didn't turn up because they can't finance it?
Why must the people who held the wedding dinner in Ritz Charlton EXPECT that they would not make a loss when the wedding dinner is about inviting friends and relatives to celebrate their big day?
Why must we be forced to say that we can't attend the wedding because of some stupid reasons that weren't really the clause just because we can't afford the stupid red packet?
IF that is SO, THEN the TRADITIONAL WEDDING DINNER IS AN UGLY CUSTOM MADE TO FORCE POOR PEOPLE OUT. -
Yeah.Originally posted by shinta:we're talkin about if WE are the ones holding the dinner aka the couple gettin married.
And I'm talking about this issue, because my bro's holding his Chinese wedding dinner next year. Look at the first post in this thread.
Single can still talk about this, mah! -
Married
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Deportivo
Sydney Librarian (bloody long nick!)
chocoB
Single
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Rhonda
Nelstar
Bear
neuros
Entering death of courtship
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shinta -
no. u can skip the whole stupid thing de.Originally posted by edLow:\but it's still help out rite?
since u all mention bout "HELPING OUT" for the couple.
there are things which we can help and things we cant..
u cant possible pay for the whole dinner for ur frd becos u are really damn filthy rich rite?
helpin out via takin pix.. yes. that's considered helpin out.
if u're talkin about the "no u can't enter n get to the bride unless u do this and that or give us $X" den ut's not considered helpin out. -
SL = Sydney LibrarianOriginally posted by Deportivo:Married
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Deportivo
SL (who?)
chocoB
Single
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Rhonda
Nelstar
Bear
Entering death of courtship
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Shinta
Oh, and neuros - single too! -
obviously one will hold their dinner within their status n budget wat...Originally posted by shinta:no money, dun hold wedding dinner. simple as that.
Ang pows are meant given in teh past as some sort of a blessing for the wedded couples. OR you could think of it as a gift. With cash being more practical.
It doesn matter if u're malay or chinese. The meaning behind is the same.
No money dun hold the dinner at a 5-star hotel.
u think any ah cat ah dog also can afford to hold his/her dinner at some high class hotel ballroom meh?
if the parents insist on doing it in some high class hotel ballroom, den it the parents whom kill the children.. and if the couple decided to hold at someplace out of their budget becos of face prob.. den it's themselves whom kill themselves.. as frds wat we can do.. is to give within our budget n market rate -
Originally posted by shinta:if u're talkin about the "no u can't enter n get to the bride unless u do this and that or give us $X" den ut's not considered helpin out.
Actually, if you look into a lot of our wedding traditions, it's very steeped in money one! 
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he's talkin about.. him attendin dinners.Originally posted by Rhonda:Yeah.
And I'm talking about this issue, because my bro's holding his Chinese wedding dinner next year. Look at the first post in this thread.
Single can still talk about this, mah!
completely off.
tho we were talkin about some of the reasons to why ppl have or skip dinners
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Precisely.Originally posted by Nelstar:What is the point of having a wedding dinner at a 5-star hotel because you expected ang-paos that can defray the cost?
What is the point of having guests when those who can pay turn up and half of those good friends didn't turn up because they can't finance it?
Why must the people who held the wedding dinner in Ritz Charlton EXPECT that they would not make a loss when the wedding dinner is about inviting friends and relatives to celebrate their big day?
Why must we be forced to say that we can't attend the wedding because of some stupid reasons that weren't really the clause just because we can't afford the stupid red packet?
IF that is SO, THEN the TRADITIONAL WEDDING DINNER IS AN UGLY CUSTOM MADE TO FORCE POOR PEOPLE OUT. -
Why so scared of making yourself stand out?
You give less because you simply - bo lui. And your host should understand your financial situation with the mentality of - nevermind, just very happy you can be here.
You give more because - hey I'm so glad my good friend's getting married! I'm feeling generous and I can afford more, OK lah give bigger ang pow.Originally posted by edLow:tat why follow the market rate. if everyone is giving a certain amt. why give less or more to make urself stand out? -
oh dear... nellie = nelstar lar...Originally posted by Deportivo:Married
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Deportivo
SL (who?)
chocoB
Single
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Rhonda
Nelstar
Bear
Entering death of courtship
===================
shinta
we're gettin married soon... so it should be
enterin tomb of courtship
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Nelstar & shinta -
Buried in the tomb
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Deportivo
Sydney Librarian (bloody long nick!)
chocoB
Hanging high and dry
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Rhonda
Bear
neuros
Entering tomb of courtship
===================
shinta
Nelstar -
What the point?Originally posted by edLow:obviously one will hold their dinner within their status n budget wat...
u think any ah cat ah dog also can afford to hold his/her dinner at some high class hotel ballroom meh?
if the parents insist on doing it in some high class hotel ballroom, den it the parents whom kill the children.. and if the couple decided to hold at someplace out of their budget becos of face prob.. den it's themselves whom kill themselves.. as frds wat we can do.. is to give within our budget n market rate
Why don't you put on the wedding invitation card this message: "Expected red-packet to be at $80 or above pax, if you can't pay, give some lame excuse will you?" -
if tat the case... den do it within ur budget lor... den why u worry so much bout ur guest's ang pow...Originally posted by shinta:we're talkin about if WE are the ones holding the dinner aka the couple gettin married.
if worry so much. den dont bother to have one lah. short n sweet.
the couple had this dinner becos of celebration. why u all must make it like it sound like a serious debts to them... and if u all dont make it sound like a debt. would i break down to the frd's persective.. if tat wat u ppls think. den forget wat i say and enjoy the chat u guys had among urself.
i here offering my personnel suggestion as a guest to u whom own suggestion as the one holding it. -
the teochew 4 dian jing osoOriginally posted by Rhonda:
Actually, if you look into a lot of our wedding traditions, it's very steeped in money one!
i told nellie my mom's a teochew... and chances are she'd want the 4 dian jing..
and he said sth like... den we dun get married lor (
)
not sure if i rmbered correctly.. -
if tat the case why do u wan to hold one either in a normal resturant all the way to the hotel ball room.Originally posted by Nelstar:What is the point of having a wedding dinner at a 5-star hotel because you expected ang-paos that can defray the cost?
What is the point of having guests when those who can pay turn up and half of those good friends didn't turn up because they can't finance it?
Why must the people who held the wedding dinner in Ritz Charlton EXPECT that they would not make a loss when the wedding dinner is about inviting friends and relatives to celebrate their big day?
Why must we be forced to say that we can't attend the wedding because of some stupid reasons that weren't really the clause just because we can't afford the stupid red packet?
IF that is SO, THEN the TRADITIONAL WEDDING DINNER IS AN UGLY CUSTOM MADE TO FORCE POOR PEOPLE OUT.
if tat the case...... -
I meant, we register lawfully in the GOVT book and ignore your mom's nonsense.Originally posted by shinta:the teochew 4 dian jing oso
i told nellie my mom's a teochew... and chances are she'd want the 4 dian jing..
and he said sth like... den we dun get married lor ( )
not sure if i rmbered correctly.. -
read from page 1... most of us are against havin one.Originally posted by edLow:if tat the case... den do it within ur budget lor... den why u worry so much bout ur guest's ang pow...
if worry so much. den dont bother to have one lah. short n sweet.
the couple had this dinner becos of celebration. why u all must make it like it sound like a serious debts to them... and if u all dont make it sound like a debt. would i break down to the frd's persective.. if tat wat u ppls think. den forget wat i say and enjoy the chat u guys had among urself.
i here offering my personnel suggestion as a guest to u whom own suggestion as the one holding it. -
n u should ask the ladies why are they enjoy doing tat and leeching the groom another sum of money.Originally posted by shinta:no. u can skip the whole stupid thing de.
helpin out via takin pix.. yes. that's considered helpin out.
if u're talkin about the "no u can't enter n get to the bride unless u do this and that or give us $X" den ut's not considered helpin out. -
u said u dun wan to marry me de.Originally posted by Nelstar:I meant, we register lawfully in the GOVT book and ignore your mom's nonsense. -
This is what I do. Try to help out as friends.
But if really cannot then bo bian la.
If the couple's gonna take offense that I pay below cost, I think seriously the friendship needs some looking intoOriginally posted by edLow:.. as frds wat we can do.. is to give within our budget n market rate