Past Relationships
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Heard this on the radio talkshow last evening and thought I'll post it here.
This lady wrote in to the radio station to seek advice from listeners. She told her boyfriend about her past relationships and her current beau wants to break up with her.
Her question. Should one reveal one's past to present partner? What do you think? Will you?
p.s. don't ask me ah. I'm the threadstarter so reserves the right to comment.
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the truth will set you free...
if the current partner minds her past so much, he's not much good is he?
love is unconditional.. if it was any other way, it isn't love at all
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If you were to hide your past from your beau, wouldn't you be haunted by the question about whether he'll still love you despite and in spite of? Would you rather know, or not know?
Everyone makes mistakes, especially in our youth. I guess our mistakes aren't the important thing - what really matters is that we've learnt from our mistakes, we're now on a clean slate, we are wiser and we are putting our wisdom to good use by maybe giving advice to others in the same boat... It's what we're making out of our lives NOW that matters.
We cannot erase the past, no matter how embarrassed or remorseful we are about it. Even God forgives those who ask for forgiveness! So, who is mere man to hold it against someone else?
If a man cannot see beyond the past, if he cannot appreciate the woman for who she is now, and who she will become, then, it really isn't love, but some kinda 'cattle parade' to search for the 'perfect cow'... oops, sorry, to be politically correct, it ought to be, the trophy wife. -
Erm.. I hope he wun ask..
I wun ask also.. coz I will not mind his past.. what I'm concern is the present and the future, if there is future for us.. -
I'm very curious and kay poh, I would like to know.
At the same time, I'm quite worried about the can of worms I might be opening. -
Oh, if knowing about his past will reveal that he loves his ex much much more than he does me, then, I really don't wanna know!
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Its gd to be honest... but its whether the other party can tahan it or nt! If other party is 1 gigantic vinegar jar... try nt to reveal too much!
Who dun hve a past!!
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Gigantic vinegar jar!!Originally posted by BlUe G@rF|eLd:Its gd to be honest... but its whether the other party can tahan it or nt! If other party is 1 gigantic vinegar jar... try nt to reveal too much!
Who dun hve a past!! Funneeeee!!! 
Welcome to Club 30, BlUe G@rF|eLd! -
Just don't ask for what you think you might not be ble to handle...otherwise, honesty is the best policy. I suppose it's okay to feel a little disappointed if he/she did things you hoped they never did, but not for too long.
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Wah, KB......very sound.Originally posted by Kuali Baba:Just don't ask for what you think you might not be ble to handle....
Her guy felt threatened after hearing about the last chap. Maybe she spills more than she should or maybe the new guy can't handle it. Anyways, she didn't write if she was prompted with it or she just offered voluntarily to share/tell. -
still feel you cannot change the past...
and if told, appreciate the honesty... and love her more for it...
doesn't matter what happened in the past.. make the future so good that the past is immaterial
that's how i look at it... -
Yeap, agree but guys really got such big heart ah?Originally posted by the Bear:still feel you cannot change the past...
and if told, appreciate the honesty... and love her more for it...
doesn't matter what happened in the past.. make the future so good that the past is immaterial
that's how i look at it...
One listener called to share that her husband sometimes used her past against her during a quarrel. She added that her husband judged her with it too.
There were about eight callers. Half said to keep mum as those were her past business and nothing to do with the new guy. The other half, like most of the posts here indicated, better to share.
I guess it works both ways, like will a guy reveals his past to his present girlfriend, right? -
well, don't tar all with the same brush
i still believe in love.. which is always unconditionalOriginally posted by littlestream:Yeap, agree but guys really got such big heart ah?
One listener called to share that her husband sometimes used her past against her during a quarrel. She added that her husband judged her with it too.
There were about eight callers. Half said to keep mum as those were her past business and nothing to do with the new guy. The other half, like most of the posts here indicated, better to share.
I guess it works both ways, like will a guy reveals his past to his present girlfriend, right? -
Hehe!! Thx Thx!!Originally posted by Rhonda:Gigantic vinegar jar!! Funneeeee!!!
Welcome to Club 30, BlUe G@rF|eLd! -
Yeah, I know and I like believe I don't. I've no rights anyways.Originally posted by the Bear:well, don't tar all with the same brush
i still believe in love.. which is always unconditional
But Bear......you sure make people drool eh? With your last sentence. Now, I find it hard to believe you are alone!!! Seems you have so much love in you so why are you keeping it all to yourself? Surely, there are prospects to give it out to. Now, who is selfish? -
But first it'll piss u off.Originally posted by the Bear:the truth will set you free...
i guess the guy pissed... realli OFF liao... -
i am selfish
i'm pretty terrible.. if i was a girl, i'd stay away from me -
i wun mind my partner telling her past..n she will know my past.
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Hee hee...........alamak.......Bear........want to quickly edit or not?Originally posted by the Bear:i am selfish
i'm pretty terrible.. if i was a girl, i'd stay away from me
Sekali got admirer and then see this post........cha bot liao. Just kidding lah.
It takes a lot more than just one sentence and I'm sure you know it too. -
nah.. not editing
all part of love
we love them despite their flaws... -
Everyone should have a past relationship ma..If my partner cannot accept den forget it..She probaly doesn't love me,but just lusting after me..Its ok..I can forgive it..
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yeah..takes more than just one sentence...Originally posted by littlestream:Hee hee...........alamak.......Bear........want to quickly edit or not?
Sekali got admirer and then see this post........cha bot liao. Just kidding lah.
It takes a lot more than just one sentence and I'm sure you know it too.
i wrote one sentence which has already described what I have been holding for so long. -
hee hee.........wah, deep ah. i had to go re-read your post leh. and still, i have to read this post slowly. got to sung now jin see got hidden meaning or not? but even reading in between the lines, (by the way, you didn't give me many lines to go in between) i still didn't get what you have been holding for so long.Originally posted by kaobeikaobu:yeah..takes more than just one sentence...
i wrote one sentence which has already described what I have been holding for so long.
alamak......pai seh. want to be more direct or elaborate or not? if not, it's okay. i'll pretend to understand lah. -
Ignorance is bliss ..... sometimes .......
like it or not ..... knowledge of the past can and do change certain things .......
can anyone gurantee that your feelings and the way you see another person won't be changed by certain revealations ? ..... much less a loved one ? .... -
it'll be changed.. yes.. but ultimately, the big question.. do i love her..
and if it is yes, the rest of the questions and whatever doesn't much matter anymore...
for how do you go into love, with defences up?
i would think one goes in totally vulnerable... defenceless...Originally posted by Fatum:Ignorance is bliss ..... sometimes .......
like it or not ..... knowledge of the past can and do change certain things .......
can anyone gurantee that your feelings and the way you see another person won't be changed by certain revealations ? ..... much less a loved one ? ....