A discussion on Life and Marriage...
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Sigh...whats with our toilet training nowadays? Why can't people be trained to just vomit into the toilet bowl instead of the sink?? They're often just next to each other anyway!Originally posted by elindra:He cooked for me, looked after me and even unclogged the sink which was choked full of my vomit
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I helped dearling catch a spider in her room ...Originally posted by Wanda:
My SO also fixed my choked sink without being asked....got his hands all dirty, and he had to clean up afterwards.
So single guys....ahem... you got your tip already.
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Some people tend not to remarry after a failed marriage...perhaps it just takes too much work..without a guarantee that it will work a second time.Originally posted by Ferret:Can you imagine staying with someone for...50 years ?
Someone once told me, that if he married, it will be for love, and if that love fails, he will never remarried again.
Is that the right thing to do ? Does it show that he value marriage ? Or is it just hot air ?
Since you can't control the future, what's the use of worrying about it... (to quote The Dalai Lama).Originally posted by Ferret:I think everyone has a list of whats "best".
Like looks, $$$, brains, etc....
People ideas and attitude on life changes with years, what happens when the things you are happy with now no longer satisfy you in the future ? what then ?
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But not everyone had the same idea on commitment in a marriage right ?Originally posted by bluejuice:It takes 2 hands to clap..
What if...what if...say sway ur partner thinks nothing of giving up easily ?
What then..?
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Thats really sweetOriginally posted by elindra:Very hard to tell you
For me it's his actions and attitude towards me
He is always there for me, be it happy times or sad times or when I was down with food poisoning and alone at home ( parents on holiday, brother serving NS)
He cooked for me, looked after me and even unclogged the sink which was choked full of my vomit
He took the trouble to get to know my brother even though he knows he is difficult to approach.
He shows my parents respect.
Haha he was so cute even before he proposed to me. He actually asked my father permission to marry me (Dad told me later)
And a tad old fashioned
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IT's good to be handy around the house...so learn!Originally posted by hisoka:so learn to fix choked sinks with bare hands?
Catch spiders, mop the floor, cook, etc. ...SC's husband-training in progress. -
have u any idea how much more a woman have to lose to press tat "reset" button?Originally posted by hisoka:cos marraige got reset button called divorce. even better for females cos they stand to gain alot from the reset button. -
I've never cleaned any chocked sink before in my life. Plumbers are not around for nothing!
Look guys....I see that this discussion is getting very serious (except for a few). For something as large as marriage and life....sometimes we have to sit back, relax, not think too much, and see the light-hearted side of life. Thats one good first step to a successful union of any kind. -
why catch spiders and not kill them?Originally posted by Wanda:IT's good to be handy around the house...so learn!
Catch spiders, mop the floor, cook, etc. ...SC's husband-training in progress. 
i can mop and cook. i think i even know how to clear a sink, well at least the bsics. much use it has been, no girl throwing herself at me
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That shows that he's not that into you. Bring on next player.Originally posted by Ferret:But not everyone had the same idea on commitment in a marriage right ?
What if...what if...say sway ur partner thinks nothing of giving up easily ?
What then..? -
So if there was a chance...just grab ?Originally posted by Fatum:love is not a science .... it's a feeling in your guts .... the tightening of the chest, the butterflies in your stomach ....
there is no point in rationalizing and dissecting it ... always trust your heart and never your head .... and take that leap ....
some people will leap to the wrong place ... some will find happiness .... but at least there'll be no regrets ....
Sounds...scary and a little to me. (sorry cant find that word)
So can love and marriage be mutually exclusive ? -
If never then too bad lor. I'm prepared to live with the consequences of that mindset (stay single forever)Originally posted by Ferret:What if NEVER meet that "perfect" person how ?
Is that why people settle for second best ?
And how do you live with second best for 50 years ? >.<"
So those people u mentioned, marrying under pressure, subject themselves to "unintended union" for the rest of their lives ?
(btw, that doesn't mean I'm looking for some perfect 10 woman with zero flaws ok. I just mean I want to only marry someone that I really really really want to spend the rest of my life with, and hopefully she feels the same. that person may come in any shape or form. I'll know it when or if she ever appears I guess lol)
I cannot stand the thought of 'settling' for 'second best'
Yes. -
love is a pre-requisite for marriage, no ? ....Originally posted by Ferret:So if there was a chance...just grab ?
Sounds...scary and a little to me. (sorry cant find that word)
So can love and marriage be mutually exclusive ?
yes, I'd just grab ... cos if you think and compare and dissect anyone or any relationship too much ... you'll start to find it wanting ....
you'll have to take it on blind faith ... or the butterflies in the stomach shall never flutter ..... -
Yes, engagement can be very stressful with all the wedding preparations (just look at our don_don), the money involved, the decisions, etcOriginally posted by Ferret:Engagement is more stressful ?
Making the effort in marriage....yes, I think thats it.
I think marriage entails so much. Commitment of heart, mind, soul and everything else.
Why would some people take it as if its a transaction T.T
Like any relationship (including normal friendship), it's important to make an effort to keep the bond strong, to get to know the person. My hubby and I had been going out for 5 years plus 12 mths engagement before we got married. We will be celebrating our 2nd anniversary in Sept this year. However, if you ask me whether I know everything about my hubby after being together for so long, I would still say no.
While I know him very well generally, there are always new things to learn about each other, especially during certain circumstances. So, it's important in a relationship not to make too many assumptions thinking that you know your partner so well that you stop making any effort in knowing him better.
I think it will help when you look at your partner not just as your partner (to have sex with you, to provide for you etc) but also your best friend and soul mate.
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So length of time does not really determines the outcome of the marriage. then...what would ?Originally posted by the Bear:for some, 3 months is enough time
for some i know, they've been together for bloody ages (i think close to 10 years) before getting married and the bloody marriage didn't last a year!!
i figure, if both work on it and can get along, and love each other (loving each other doesn't mean they can get along, and getting along doesn't mean they love each other), the marriage has a chance to work
if there is a chance of happiness, make a mad grab for it
Another mad grab... ? Sounds like "trifling" the whole concept off marriage (yay i found the word!) -
What? So easy? YOu think gals like to throw themselves at any plumber issit?Originally posted by hisoka:why catch spiders and not kill them?
i can mop and cook. i think i even know how to clear a sink, well at least the bsics. much use it has been, no girl throwing herself at me -
be it 3 mths, 3 yrs or 3 decade.... if both ain't willing to put in effort to make it works, the marriage will still fail...
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We usually just use the vacuum cleaner to get rid of the spiders.Originally posted by Wanda:Catch spiders, -
you live in australia ... where some of the spiders can actually kill you .. I'd do the same too ....Originally posted by honeymouse:We usually just use the vacuum cleaner to get rid of the spiders.
the spider in question was a hapless little grey house spider which promptly curled up and froze when I dumped it onto the snow outside .... (I still feel bad about murdering it ... ) -
it is not a science..
logic and application of math and all that do nothing in the affairs of the heart...
for love has reasons reason can never understandOriginally posted by Ferret:So length of time does not really determines the outcome of the marriage. then...what would ?
Another mad grab... ? Sounds like "trifling" the whole concept off marriage (yay i found the word!) -
can har??!!Originally posted by honeymouse:We usually just use the vacuum cleaner to get rid of the spiders.
i usually just scream and hope it goes away -
Scream won't help. I tried that a few times too.... usually just do it for fun.Originally posted by tare:can har??!!
i usually just scream and hope it goes away
Anyway, yes vacuum cleaner can surely do the job! -
Your dog..? My foster cats love to catch insects...then they lick it up and go *gulp!*Originally posted by tare:can har??!!
i usually just scream and hope it goes away
Sorry, OT. -
imagine a large number of spiders which may still be alive in the vacuum bag
just remember.. spiders are friends
they rarely bite people and even the big tarantulas are pretty cool... just gently coax them away if you don't like them around...
(i like spiders)Originally posted by tare:can har??!!
i usually just scream and hope it goes away -
i scream my dog look at me.. then see the spider go over sniff sniff lick lick... i scream even more!!!! he got scared by me walked away play with his toyOriginally posted by Wanda:Your dog..? My foster cats love to catch insects...then they lick it up and go *gulp!*
Sorry, OT.