Observations at the Supermarket and Shopping Mall
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which is why I emphasized on the best possible method and best to remain in control. There is a difference between 'telling someone off' and 'telling that person it is not appropriate'. Second is... well saying it doesn't mean the person will agree with you. So if the person gets upset, well walk away. It isn't a pride issue. But the next time the person does the same thing again, he MIGHT think twice. That makes a lot of difference right? And if second time the person does it again, he gets the SAME type of response - well he will think much longer when he repeats himself.Originally posted by av98m:errmmm...the few times I tried to do that I was threatened with violence or actually attacked. didn't matter if it was an auntie or uncle or younger person.
reminds me of that old case of the lawyer who was badly beaten up after he told some idiots to keep their voices down while watching a movie in the cinema
Thirdly, the case of that lawyer IS THE EXACT example of apathy. IF ENOUGH PEOPLE SPOKE UP and defended him. IF the force of the greater population is against that one violent idiot - THEN he would not have gotten beaten up. It's becos EVERYONE DIAMDIAM, that's why violence gets its way!
I've told my husband once after telling an Ah bEng to Please stop talking on the phone in the cinema that if... one day, I die or get violently attacked because I have spoken -PLEASE understand why I am doing so and don't think it isn't 'worth it' Better to live a life uncompromised than to live one pointing fingers. -
I do feel that one has to be a 'proper' frame of mind befre you speak up. If you can't remain in control - don't.Originally posted by Kuali Baba:There was a point in time however where I realised that I have to protect myself and keep my stress levels and blood pressure down. The other option would be closing an eye to such behaviour, but that would be the beginning of apathy. I don't want to lapse into that sort of attitude either.
One group of people have offensive behavior becos they are socially inept, inconsiderate or violent.
But another group of people who are self righteous, point fingers, have no qualms in putting down his fellow human beings are equally disgusting and offensive too. And I find it even worse - because they usually ARE smarter, ARE better - SO why aren't they more humane?
It's simply another manifestation of elitism that we are better than the 'common Singaporean' -
This happen to myself and my husband. We ran into this family living above us. The ah beng husband or the ah lian wife.. they smoke in the lift with or without their bunch of untaught children. The kids will play jumping on the floor throughout the day and into late nights and the adults would invite all their ah beng friends and pretty much like open gambling den and play majong.
When once I told the husband that its dangerous to smoke in lift. He actually gave me some face and told me to shut up. I called town council. Thinking back I should have called the police. -
actually, i dunno.. there are many people who tell me to mind my own business... my own folks included..
now, i still remember pointing out and telling someone it is not right to do something, and getting clipped behind the ear by my own folks for doing so..
and my folks were apologising for my actions.. as if i was wrong to point out that the guy was doing something which was bloody unreasonable and wrong..
things like that, if done to a person less.. uhh.. i dunno.. less.. obstinate than me, would have a deep impression such that the person will never ever speak up again...
so, folks out there with children.. if your child has the guts to speak out against things like that, have the guts to back up your child when you know your child is right... -
err...I say very nicely already leh, still liddat. I think a lot of these people are very frustrated/repressed/depressed so even small thing will set them off.Originally posted by ShrodingersCat:which is why I emphasized on the best possible method and best to remain in control. There is a difference between 'telling someone off' and 'telling that person it is not appropriate'. Second is... well saying it doesn't mean the person will agree with you. So if the person gets upset, well walk away. It isn't a pride issue. But the next time the person does the same thing again, he MIGHT think twice. That makes a lot of difference right? And if second time the person does it again, he gets the SAME type of response - well he will think much longer when he repeats himself.
Thirdly, the case of that lawyer IS THE EXACT example of apathy. IF ENOUGH PEOPLE SPOKE UP and defended him. IF the force of the greater population is against that one violent idiot - THEN he would not have gotten beaten up. It's becos EVERYONE DIAMDIAM, that's why violence gets its way!
I've told my husband once after telling an Ah bEng to Please stop talking on the phone in the cinema that if... one day, I die or get violently attacked because I have spoken -PLEASE understand why I am doing so and don't think it isn't 'worth it' Better to live a life uncompromised than to live one pointing fingers.
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It is this lack of manners that I hate about Sg. Each visit I make is always tainted like that and after two weeks there, I need to leave. The sheer lack of social graciousness and basic courtesies just gets to me.
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and its getting worse year after year.Originally posted by jetta:It is this lack of manners that I hate about Sg. Each visit I make is always tainted like that and after two weeks there, I need to leave. The sheer lack of social graciousness and basic courtesies just gets to me. -
Sadly, I believe it. My question is: Why?Originally posted by av98m:and its getting worse year after year. -
Yesterday when the bus stop at a bus stop, I stared at this young late teen couple hugging until they felt uncomfortable. The only thing running through my mind is: "They must be having lots of s*x and enjoying it." At the next stop, this girl/boy cannot tell the direction kid early teens, sat talking on the phone with the leg up on the seat like a Ah Beng. I think my stare is effective last night. Once again, the kid felt uncomfortable and brought the leg down. I wonder, don't anyone in these young people's life ever tell them how to behave in public?
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That's assuming the kids parent know how to behave in public 1st. If the beam on top is misalign dun expect the one below to be any better.Originally posted by mistyblue:Yesterday when the bus stop at a bus stop, I stared at this young late teen couple hugging until they felt uncomfortable. The only thing running through my mind is: "They must be having lots of s*x and enjoying it." At the next stop, this girl/boy cannot tell the direction kid early teens, sat talking on the phone with the leg up on the seat like a Ah Beng. I think my stare is effective last night. Once again, the kid felt uncomfortable and brought the leg down. I wonder, don't anyone in these young people's life ever tell them how to behave in public?
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yeah.. sometimes the adults/parents are worse.