If you're over 35 and still single, are you happy or sad?

• OneWithTheForce

  15 Nov 09, 19:51

  As a guy of a certain age, I've become quite aware of certain pressure, and it affects me sometimes.

   

  I know this lady who is hitting 43 soon. Nice lady, average looks and a body of someone her age, still single. She tries hard, always goes to events, sports etc to meet people, but no success. For all the self confidence she has, it gets her down from time to time.

   

  If you're over 35, do you feel that twinge of bitterness or self depression when you see another couple get engaged, or if you see someone you know wiith some hot young guy/girl?

   

  Please, no married good looking guys/girls saying tripe s.h.i.t like- you should be happy with yourself, having another person in your life doesnt matter,  etc etc

• angel3070

  15 Nov 09, 19:54

  Originally posted by OneWithTheForce:

  I know this lady who is hitting 43 soon. Nice lady, average looks and a body of someone her age, still single. She tries hard, always goes to events, sports etc to meet people, but no success. For all the self confidence she has, it gets her down from time to time.

  That's sad.

• Rooney9

  15 Nov 09, 19:54

  getting married for the sake of it, is a no no. you tend to make decision that you may regret for the rest of your life.

   

  its ok to stay single and lead a happy lifestyle. marry someone who is incompatible or irresponsible is the worst decision ever made by you.

• deepak.c

  15 Nov 09, 19:58

   

  Once you hit 30 y.o., it gets harder and harder to get hitched.

   

  Blame it on the unrealistic expectations of Singaporean women.

   

  Once you hit 35 y.o., I think you should make preparations for old age and eventual death alone, knowing that you have left no legacy behind.

   

  Perhaps a life in vain is not a life in disdain.

   

   

   

• Rooney9

  15 Nov 09, 20:01

  you can get married even after 30, 40 or 50, as long as you eventually meet the right person.

   

  if you dun, better remain single, than marry for the sake of it. It will be the worst decision you ever made if you rush for it, just because you are getting old.

• av98m

  15 Nov 09, 20:03

  one of my female friends who is over 35 was telling me about men that sign up with dating agencies. the men in their 20s only want women in their 20s. men in their 30s also want only women in their 20s. men in their 40s also want only women in their 20s. that's why she pretty much gave up on these dating agencies. if you look at the mail order bride industry, its the same thing. ah peks only wanting 18 yr old virgins.

• deepak.c

  15 Nov 09, 20:04

   

  Getting married at 40 to 50?

   

  Still can have children?

   

  Yes. We have heard rich USA men in the 70s and 80s still marries under 30s women.

   

  Not having children, what's the point of marriage, might as well cohabit.

   

   

• deepak.c

  15 Nov 09, 20:05

  Originally posted by av98m:

  one of my female friends who is over 35 was telling me about men that sign up with dating agencies. the men in their 20s only want women in their 20s. men in their 30s also want only women in their 20s. men in their 40s also want only women in their 20s. that's why she pretty much gave up on these dating agencies. if you look at the mail order bride industry, its the same thing. ah peks only wanting 18 yr old virgins.

   

  That's the common thinking amongst men, if they can't get under 30s, they will find Vietnamese or PRC brides.

   

   

• deepak.c

  15 Nov 09, 20:10

   

  I think these western values only result in more unmarried Singaporean women, they think they have the earning ability, adopts a more liberal lifestyle.

   

  Before they know it, they hit 30s and realised that they can't turn back the clock.

   

  You only have yourself to blame.

   

  Rational expectation is not so rational afterall.

   

   

• angel3070

  15 Nov 09, 20:11

  30s or 40s is fine with me as long as the personality is compatible.

   

• Rooney9

  15 Nov 09, 20:11

  cannot have children can adopt. heard of IVF? some fertile couple married at age 20-30 plus already decided not to have children.

   

  its ok not to have children, just like its ok to remain single. its their lives, what they want to do with it. they are all kinds of people in this world, each choosing the lifestyle to live, single, married etc. there are also single parent who has never married. so who are you to lecture or say them.

• deepak.c

  15 Nov 09, 20:13

  Originally posted by Rooney9:

  cannot have children can adopt. heard of IVF? some fertile couple married at age 20-30 plus already decided not to have children.

   

  its ok not to have children, just like its ok to remain single. its their lives, what they want to do with it. they are all kinds of people in this world, each choosing the lifestyle to live, single, married etc. there are also single parent who has never married. so who are you to lecture or say them.

   

  When you adopt it's different. It's easier said than done, serious.

   

  You ever try adopting a child, treat it like your own flesh and blood?

   

  Ultimately, at the end of the day, the child is not yours, it doesn't have your genetic material, it's like being an orphanage.

   

• Rooney9

  15 Nov 09, 20:14

  Originally posted by deepak.c:

   

  When you adopt it's different. It's easier said than done, serious.

   

  You ever try adopting a child, treat it like your own flesh and blood?

   

  Ultimately, at the end of the day, the child is not yours, it doesn't have your genetic material, it's like being an orphanage.

   

  tell that to the pitts.

• wee_ws

  15 Nov 09, 20:17

  Hi,

    The amount of happiness that you have depends on the amount of freedom that you have in your heart. -- Thich Nhat Hanh

  Cheers,
  Wen Shih

• av98m

  15 Nov 09, 20:17

  Originally posted by deepak.c:

   

  That's the common thinking amongst men, if they can't get under 30s, they will find Vietnamese or PRC brides.

   

   

  why are men so like that? why? haiz

• deepak.c

  15 Nov 09, 20:19

  Originally posted by Rooney9:

  tell that to the pitts.

   

  When these rich people adopt, they are like doing a social service, help the poor and under privilege of society.

   

  Madonna also adopts lots of African children, but seriously is it her own child?

   

  Why is it that these celebrity couples adopt children from 3rd world countries?

  But seriously, these adopted children, are they carrying the parents genetic material?

   

   

• deepak.c

  15 Nov 09, 20:20

  Originally posted by av98m:

  why are men so like that? why? haiz

   

  Like how charlize puts it, "men like SYT".

   

   

• martial

  15 Nov 09, 20:33

  Originally posted by av98m:

  one of my female friends who is over 35 was telling me about men that sign up with dating agencies. the men in their 20s only want women in their 20s. men in their 30s also want only women in their 20s. men in their 40s also want only women in their 20s. that's why she pretty much gave up on these dating agencies. if you look at the mail order bride industry, its the same thing. ah peks only wanting 18 yr old virgins.

  
  I am a guy in my 20s. I only want women above 30 years ago because most of them are rich they can support me financially

   

  Your female friend rich anot? If rich I want her

• av98m

  15 Nov 09, 20:37

  Originally posted by martial:

  
  I am a guy in my 20s. I only want women above 30 years ago because most of them are rich they can support me financially

   

  Your female friend rich anot? If rich I want her

  
  she hates freeloaders.

• SGporkz

  15 Nov 09, 20:40

  Originally posted by martial:

  
  I am a guy in my 20s. I only want women above 30 years ago because most of them are rich they can support me financially

   

  Your female friend rich anot? If rich I want her

  u want her?

  more like she want you or not..

   

• CannyOng

  15 Nov 09, 20:42

  Originally posted by av98m:

  one of my female friends who is over 35 was telling me about men that sign up with dating agencies. the men in their 20s only want women in their 20s. men in their 30s also want only women in their 20s. men in their 40s also want only women in their 20s. that's why she pretty much gave up on these dating agencies. if you look at the mail order bride industry, its the same thing. ah peks only wanting 18 yr old virgins.

  
  Joining those dating agency is the wrong moves...

• Poignant

  15 Nov 09, 20:44

  it will never feel good to be alone when one grows old

• martial

  15 Nov 09, 20:49

  Originally posted by av98m:

  
  she hates freeloaders.

  
  35 years old already still so chosy. She deserve to be a old virgin in that case

• gasband

  15 Nov 09, 20:52

  If you are over 35, married to a woman who looks like she is 55, waking up beside her every morning, having her nag and nag, having 2 kids who shouts and screams at the top of their lungs every time they want something, and have to go home before 9PM every night or else the wife will nag and nag again, and thus having to endure the taunts of henpecked husband by your single friends..... are you happy or sad?

• martial

  15 Nov 09, 20:55

  Originally posted by gasband:

  If you are over 35, married to a woman who looks like she is 55, waking up beside her every morning, having her nag and nag, having 2 kids who shouts and screams at the top of their lungs every time they want something, and have to go home before 9PM every night or else the wife will nag and nag again, and thus having to endure the taunts of henpecked husband by your single friends..... are you happy or sad?

  
  You are asking me?

   

  For me as long as she is rich is ok. If I marry a rich women whom I don't love definetly I won't have kids with her.